Retarded ejaculation: Long painful sex

Men who take longer than 20 minutes during sex have a condition known as retarded ejaculation. Retarded ejaculation is when a man takes long to reach climax. This could be excruciating for a woman. Busing and soreness result in this situation.

Last week a man called me on my radio show and asked if there is anything wrong with a man have sex for 2 hours. And have sex with as many as 6 women. I usually have many machismo men with egos as high as the clouds calling the show to boost of this and that.

Over the years I have learned instead of dismissing their claims and telling them off on air.  I instead ask questions and probe until they contradict themselves until the truth emerges. This usually turns their intended chest-thumping into a deflated balloon. They soon hang-up the phone.

This time round the man hanged up before I could interrogate him.  But something about his cool demeanor got me to thinking. About the first part of his claim that he lasts for long.  But course the latter claim of having sex with 6 women; that I don’t believe.

What would make a man last longer than usual?

Given that there are four stages in sex for men:

• Excitement stage: Usually doing foreplay when it is has become clear that sex is a possibility
• Full arousal stage: During sex
• Orgasm Stage:  Climax or ejaculation
• Resolution or refractory stage:  This is the stage after ejaculation, before the next erection.

Given one’s age, health and other biological factors.  The resolution stage, according to studies. Are 15 minutes for the average 18 year old and 20 hours for a healthy male in his 70s.  And this is with of continuous stimulation.

But, in rare cases there has been documentation of a few men who do not have refractory stage. In one case study conducted at Rutgers University.  A man achieved six ejaculations in 36 minutes without going into the refractory stage.

My caller could be one of the few in a rare group of men with great toned pubococcygeus (PC) muscles.

The major difference between the study subject and my caller. Is the duration of time, 36 minutes in the latter and the alleged 2 hours for my caller. This begs the next question.

Are there men who don’t ejaculate?

There are men who suffer from a condition known as retarded or inhibited ejaculation. Which is the opposite of premature ejaculation. Ejaculation problems are as follows:

• Premature ejaculation:  here man who ejaculates immediately upon entry. Or shortly afterwards – in less than a minute or so
• Retarded or inhibited ejaculation: Retarded ejaculation is where a man would not ejaculate. Unless he has sex for 20 to 30 minutes.
• Retrograde ejaculation: this is when on ejaculated sperms flow into the bladder. Instead of though the penis. This happens to men with diabetes that destroys the nerves.

Retarded ejaculation

For some 20 minutes don’t sounds like a short time. But according to a study reported in the journal of sexual medicine. Average sex last for 5.5 minutes. But to most man it seems like 10 minutes and women even longer.

It’s also an issue of perception. Some man who take 20 minutes think they have premature ejaculation.

While another who takes 2 minutes think he takes too long.  The women also contribute to this perceptions.

Back to retarded ejaculation. The major cause of this condition is masturbation. But, there could be other factors that could cause retarded ejaculation such as;

Situational

Like the name suggest it depends on the situation. For example an older man cheating with a younger woman going back to his wife. He might not find her attractive, thus take longer.

Another situation applies to every man. There is a particular position in which each man finds it almost impossible to ejaculate.  Especially where he is not in control, such as woman on top.

General

In reference to men who generally retarded ejaculation with no particular condition.

Born

There are men who are born with this condition.

Acquired retarded ejaculation;

This is a result of certain condition such as;

• Injuries or birth defects affecting the male reproductive system
• Infections in the prostate or urinary tract
• Neurological diseases and hormonal issues such as low testosterone
• Psychological causes like, depression, anxiety, cultural and religious taboos. Also high sex expectations can lead to retarded ejaculation.
• Medication like antidepressants and high blood pressure drugs. As well as illegal drugs and alcohol abuse
• Old age also tend to take make men last longer and longer as they age.
• Reduced sexual appeal in a partner. Due to relationship issues such as infidelity

How can a man overcome these problems?

In the case where its medication, drugs and cigarette smoking. One should stop immediately and the body will heal itself.

If it’s a case of a sex position then avoid it.  Engage in positions more appealing to the man. Like the man on top is the position.

Medical issues relating to retarded ejaculations should addressed to by qualified medical Practitioners.

Better communication and openness will solve most relationship issues. But, if you can’t resolve the issues, then please enlist the help of a professional therapist.